Dating someone less attractive

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We spend much of our childhood attempting to determine just what shape will be most pleasing to our parents.

We try on different shapes and strategies until we are all twisted up and can no longer recognize that infant who embodied unconditional love. As we grow, we quickly discover that love is conditional in some way.

Likewise it is men, not women, who find gentleness attractive, because it is a symptom of openness, receptiveness, nuturing ability - feminine qualities.

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What all of this research is telling us is that attraction is not a conscious process.

This might seem harsh, and it is perhaps slightly hyperbolic; after all, it is fairly interesting to know that a girl is successful at her job, or that she works with someone famous - and an award is always impressive.

But none of these things translate into sexual or romantic attraction.

We don't look at someone and make a decision if they are attractive or not.

Many other factors come into play: visual, olfactory, auditory, and even more interesting, emotional.

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